Opinions are like butts... everyone has one...

Being overweight, in our society, takes some strength. Not physical strength… but mental, spiritual, and psychological strength. The average overweight person must endure a barrage of comments, quips, backhanded compliments etc… A person doesn’t even have to be morbidly obese to be ostracized, put down, or overlooked. A few extra pounds in any amount will surely bring about opinion after opinion about weight loss, the mental stability of the person, the willpower one just CAN’T possess, or there MUST be some hidden, underlying, seethingly horrid REASON for someone to be overweight… just like Oprah says…

Well… I beg to differ with Oprah… but I’ll get to that in a bit…

Truth… I don’t know ONE overweight person that wants to STAY being overweight. Myself included… It is not a condition that one desires to be in. Just like most smokers don’t WANT to smoke.. but do. Drinkers? They like their drink… I’ll stay away from that one… LOL.

There isn’t a day that goes by, that I don’t see myself in the mirror. I know… I see it… all of it. What I don’t need? What every overweight person DOESN’T EVER NEED? Is someone’s opinion of why we are overweight or what I mean is… someone that tries to “get to the bottom of why I am overweight”, or tries to foresee my future… for instance… “Oh girl… you are gonna die an early, terrible death… you are going to get diabetes, and have a heart attack, and leave those baby boys with no Mother…” Really? Holy cow… ever heard of being Hung by the Tongue? Why do people feel the need to put stuff like that out into the universe? HUH? Tell me! Ahem… sorry… got a little carried away there…

Last week, Howard Stern, made a rude comment on air about the “Precious” actress, Gaboret Sidibe, saying that she will “never get work again, because of her weight’. Really… did that HAVE to be said? Why is it… when a woman is completely secure in who she is… no matter what size she is… others feel the need to cut her down? I mean, have you seen the lovely Jessica Simpson? Does she look fat AT ALL to you? But what did they call her last year, while she was singing in her size 6 jeans? Fat? Yep.

Are the people writing and saying those awful things, perfect, behind their lenses and in front of their computers? I bet they aren’t!!! I bet they are pimple faced, scaredy cat maggots that have nothing better to do with their time than put other people down… to uplift themselves… presumably. We all know what Howard Stern looks like… and he has NO place to talk, which is precisely why he is behind a microphone, instead of in front of a camera… He lives in one huge glass house… huh? See… that wasn’t nice either… I shouldn’t have “gone” there… but that’s what his type of “journalism” breeds…

It broke my heart today… to see on the View… a woman that claims to have a webshow centered around her eating herself to 1,000 lbs in weight. There is supposedly a picture of her on her site, with no clothes on, in all her glory… WHY!! WHY!! WHY!! WHY!!!

That is NOT what I mean when I say that we need to be confident in ourselves and love ourselves where we are at… NO , NO , NO!!! That is NOT being confident and showing pride and having self esteem…!!! It’s showing herself as a freak show!!! It is so unbelievably sad… she has children. Is someone going to pay her to get to a thousand pounds??? Why?????

Everyone seems to have an opinion as to why someone is overweight. Oprah, whom I like, seems to believe that there needs to be a deep seated reason for all addictive behavior. While it might be true for some, I don’t believe it is true for all. Some people eat from boredom, or heartache. Some people eat because they have eaten a certain way forever, and never changed it as they got older, even though their metabolism has changed. Some people eat for pleasure. Not everyone had to have a bad childhood, or an abusive relationship, or any other sort of psychological problem to overeat… Some just see the food, and eat all of it. I don’t believe there needs to be a reason behind the weight… I just believe there needs to be a yearning to lose it, the right way.

I’ve never been abused, or neglected, or molested, or abandoned. I’ve never let someone else determine my worth. I’ve never allowed anyone else to define who I am. I’ve never felt like less of a person, for being more of a person.

I CHOSE to eat bad foods. No one was shoving it down my throat. No one was MAKING me eat, buy, or prepare it. It’s not the fast food restaurants fault, it’s not my grocery store’s fault… it’s not my parent’s fault… ITS ALL MY OWN FAULT!!!

Other people’s opinions of my life, or your life, or anyones life…should not be taken heavily. Try not to dwell on the “skinny” person’s view of what a “fat” person’s world must be like. Many times, if delivered in a caring, kind, compassionate way, an opinion can be lovely and heartfelt and well recieved… but often times, opinions are used as a way to elevate one party to diminish another… so the offending party can feel superior… for having control over their eating habits and behavior, and show you how out of control you really are…

If the “regular” sized people of the world can stop assuming that my life is one of obvious drudgery, loneliness, hatred, self loathing, hypocritical, one visit after the next to the hospital, days filled with oppression and crying… then I will stop assuming that your life is one big self hated, do I look okay in these jeans, Oh, I hope that guy notices my personality instead of my boobs, why is everyone staring at my zit, hey, am I prettier than her, oh my gosh, I am sooo hot… vapid life. It has got to be tough being so lovely on the outside, and so empty in the inside.

I am so glad my gorgeous friends aren’t empty in the inside… big, small, thin, fat, short and tall.. those I love and that love me… we see each other for who we are… women of substance… take-charge women that know where they came from and where they are going…that are way too busy to spend more than a normal amount of time primping in a mirror that lies about who we really are…

So… Opinions are like butts… everyone has one… but that doesn’t mean we have to listen to them.
Now go look in the mirror, and tell yourself you are lovely, and strong, and bright, and today.. you will follow plan and eat well… for you… not anyone else!!! Because you are worth it…